Rehab Round 1

 Where to start? Getting someone into rehab is really difficult. And I'm not just talking about convincing them to go. I'm talking about actually finding a rehab facility. If you know someone that might eventually need rehab one day you need to start looking NOW. Some places aren't open on the weekends. Some places don't admit people on Sundays. Every place costs a different amount, it's super expensive. If the addict is already in treatment such as methadone, like Chris was, some places won't take them. 

October 2019. Getting Chris into rehab. Woo that was difficult! Chris and I were doing terrible. He was gone 99% of the time and only came home to crash, and even then he slept in the guest bedroom because I didn't want to see him. I don't know how many times I had kicked him out of the house. 

I walk downstairs one Saturday and check on him in the guest bedroom. I was livid by what I saw. I texted his parents and said someone's got to come get him because I can't do this anymore. His mom called me and asked what was going on. I told her he was passed out sitting up in bed with drugs. I disposed of the drugs but I didn't want him in my house anymore. She said was she was on her way over and we were going to get him in rehab! She and her bf arrive at my house and I sit with them in her car outside the house for 2 hours calling people trying to find a rehab place that would take him. It was a Saturday and no one was answering the phones anywhere. We finally get a hold of some hotline number and a nice guy asked us a bunch of questions like, what's he on? How much does he use? Is in in treatment somewhere? Is he on methadone? How much is his dosage? How soon are yall wanting to admit him? etc. He gets all our information and gets off the phone with us to make some phone calls himself. So, while we're waiting to hear back from him we're still trying to call other places with no luck. 

He finally calls back and says there's only ONE place that will take Chris, because he's on methadone and the dosage that he's on is high. Methadone is harder to detox from than actual illegal drugs. I could go on a huge long rant about methadone but that'll be another post probably. So, we said fine! We want to talk to these people and set it up! It was in Wilmington, NC. We talk to the lady who owns and runs the place. Find out they don't do the 12step program but they do a lot of other stuff. (Now, I might be biased because I'm Christian and I've also seen how Chris was in this program and in the 12step program, but I believe if you are not in the 12 step program you are fucked! It's 12step or nothing!) But we didn't know anything about rehab really and this was the only place that would even take Chris to detox off of methadone and drugs. So we set it up! Now, just to get Chris to agree. 

We walk inside my house and wake Chris up. Sit down with him and talk to him about his addiction, what it's doing to him, to me, to everyone, we explained the rehab place. And Chris was pissed. lol. Of course. As all drug addicts are when they hear the word rehab. I was crying. His mom was crying. We were a mess. We finally get him to agree. I went upstairs and threw a bunch of his stuff in his suitcase and we spent the night over at his moms house because we were afraid he would run away that night if he stayed at home with me. (also at this time I finally broke down and I called my parents to tell them everything that was going on. I hadn't told them a single thing about Chris's addiction. They had no idea! Pride was a problem of mine and asking for help was not something I was good at. I've learned and grown since then.) Chris was so mad at me and his mom. Didn't speak to us at all that night. We had some yummy Chinese food for dinner, I did Chris's laundry, Chris fell asleep on the couch, his mom and her bf went upstairs to bed. I stayed up all night! Doing laundry, folding laundry, packing his suitcase. And I laid on the floor next to him in the den the whole night and watched tv. I don't know why I just couldn't bring myself to go lay in the bed in the guestroom. I wanted to stay by his side the whole night. I just didn't want him to think that we were doing this to him as punishment. I wanted him to understand that we were doing it out of love. And because I loved him I stayed by his side the whole night even though he was sound asleep. 

The next day we set out. Sunday morning at 4am! Got Chris loaded in the back of the car where he went back to sleep. And his mom drove and I navigated. 4 hours to Wilmington, NC! We stopped at a McDonald's to eat some breakfast. Chris started to wake up and actually speak to us again. When his mom went to the bathroom he apologized for how he acted and said he didn't realize how bad things had gotten but that if I thought he needed to go to rehab then he did. He asked if I slept good last night. I laughed and said, "I haven't been to sleep yet. I did your laundry, packed your suitcase, and spent the night on the floor next you watching tv." He was so apologetic. It was hitting him how bad things had become and that I was doing all this because I loved him and wanted him to get better. It wasn't to punish him for what he had done to me. It was about getting him better so that we could be together! I wanted to be with him! I wanted my Chris back! 

We got there and answered lots of questions, made a payment, said our tearful goodbyes, and Chris's mom and I drove back home. Chris was there a month. It was not the place for him. It isn't the place for anyone. They didn't communicate well with us. Chris of course was trying to manipulate his way out because that's what addicts do. And his mom eventually pulled him out of there. Actually his uncle went up there and got him and brought him back to his place in Myrtle Beach. I drove over to Myrtle the next day and spent a long weekend with him there. He seemed like he was a little better but he was still using. He stayed there a week before coming back to Charleston. 

October 2019 at Myrtle Beach

Sunrise at Myrtle Beach